rejection is painful. Intimate rejection particularly hurts. Experiencing lonely and missing connection share the evolutionary reason for success and reproduction. Preferably, loneliness should encourage you contact others and keep your relationships.
A UCLA research confirms that sensitiveness to pain that is emotional in exactly the same part of the mind as real pain — they could harm similarly. Our response to discomfort is affected by genetics, and in case we now have increased sensitiveness to pain that is physical we’re more susceptible to emotions of rejection. Moreover, love stimulates such strong feel-good neurochemicals that rejection can feel just like withdrawal from the drug, states anthropologist Helen Fisher. It may compel us to take part in obsessive reasoning and compulsive behavior. This proved true also for tsetse flies in lab experiments. (See “Obsessions and Love Addiction.”)
Many people start to feel much better 11 days after rejection and report a feeling of individual development; likewise after divorce proceedings, lovers begin to feel much better after months, perhaps not years.Continue reading